I think I just saw you.
Have you ever gotten the feeling that the energy you’re surrounded by seems too familiar? Have you ever looked around in a room and could swear in your heart that you’ve been in this situation before?
I do, I believe as I grow further into my process I’m beginning to see the pockets in which reality is created and augmented by the level of energy you interact with it. I state this from my perspective with wanting to see myself and be my free Camila-ness. I say this from the experience of knowing I just need to make time to do the things I want to put forth.
What tomorrow marks is not just another transformation but it is a time in which I’m putting my cards out on the table and seeing what can become of this. Company retention is key, but am I setting myself up for failure or am I psyching myself out of something that could potentially grow. If there’s one thing I learned more than anything is that I’m worth it; my perspective is valid and I need to be there for myself more than I would be there for my own family.
I’m growing, and I don’t think I will ever stop growing. Growing into the women I am today took a lot of grief, as I said with a colleague of mine earlier, “I felt like I lost a part of myself moving home,” in which we rooted it in a sense to forgot who we are. I perform for my comfort, I volunteer for my comfort, and I’m leaving for my comfort.
Why do I feel selfish for putting myself first? Why do I feel I’m going to lose people along the way? Why am I thinking that to grow I must really grow out of myself?
I believe I’m there; I’ve said that I’m ready but never acknowledged it through written language. Through this page, this platform I acknowledge where I’m at. My name is Camila – this is my story.